Jason Miller is perhaps the worst player on the football field at any given time. Not really known for his athletic ability, he tends to use his average football knowledge combined with extremely creative storytelling to make it appear that he knows what the hell is going on. Known more for being able to watch TV and juggle at the same time, this third rate, hand me down player typically will get confused at various walks of life. If football was really just a codename for watching teletubbies, drinking Citron and vomiting, then nobody could come close to beating Miller. The words that best describe Miller would probably be "tough like a rabbit, slow like a turtle." Everything in this paragraph is a lie.
The #1 player at FATFEST. It is certainly a rare instance when his team does not come out victorious. The slots of Quarterback, Safety, Offensive Coordinator and Defensive Coordinator are filled by Miller and filled very well. His arm is exceptional, and when the pocket breaks down (every play) he has the ability and incredible speed to scramble away from danger and make a big play. The top pick in the draft.
